Talking to my friends isn't limited to people I know intimately but includes those that are close by proximity in miles between us and people we meet along life's highway that are what we like to call "divine appointments." I believe the first time I heard the term divine appointments was in the book, The Prayer of Jabez by Bruce Wilkinson. God puts us on His directed path and along the way He places people in strategic points along that path for each of us to meet exactly when we need them and they need us. Divine appointments! They are God's plan for friendships that last and are functional at the same time.
What happens when friendships end? Blam! Door slams! The end. Stop! Reverse or rehearse! Find the next point or wonder in the desert for food! Look back or cut some slack. Say goodbye or wish, oh, wish why! Friendships, though fleeting, have an eternal hope for future eternity. They are written in the Book of Friends in eternity. Your hope is to meet them again in future eternity.
Detour message: Man, I went to www.friendship.com/au for some content & found a skeleton, dead, and picked to death from abuse and unuse. The site hasn't been updated since 2007. Scary! I sent them a message to help me understand why they've neglected something as precious a friends.
Back now--So, where were we? We discussed communication as a way to keep the fire burning. Friendships need warmth and comfort like a cozy blanket by the fireplace. Divine appointments are strategically place on the path of life so there's someone at your place of need when they are needed. Friendships never end. It's like cyberspace. If you put it out there it can be found if you know how to do the search and retrieve. Friendships are written in The Book of Friends in eternity.
Let's go on a few more paragraphs making a definition of friendship or accepting what the world considers a delineation of what constitutes friendship. From a University of Stanford website in the area of Philosophy, love seems to be the stabilizing factor in friendships. However, there are 3 different types of love.
- agape love -creates value intrinsically and exponentially that increases with time and shadows the love of God toward us;
- eros love - sensual & sexual in desire toward the friend going past the boundaries of agape love. Usually kind of love that marital partners have one for the other.
- philia love- affectionate regards or friendly feelings toward all who one may be in relationship with such as;
***family; ***friends like ones at school or neighbors; ***employer/employee or peers in community relationships; ***love for your country.
Site: http://plato.stanford.edu/entries/friendship/
I must apologize for not saying anything concerning my favorite job--friendships. The percent return on friendship is only measured when attention to the relationship goes lacking. So, I ask your forgiveness. I will work harder at keeping this blog up-to-date.
You see, I don't have a money-making job. I use my master's degree to homeschool my grandson. He was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 3. He's 11 now and doing extremely well. We manage at least 2-3 good days per week and on the not-so-good days we may complete one simple task. The really cool thing I observed on the few good days this week was how I'm learning from him as much as I hope he's learning from me. Also, we make sure there's plenty of learning goin' on out of the "virtual" classroom like grocery shopping from a list that keeps us within our budget, baking and measuring and mixing as well as oven preheating and timing cook time.
Some other important tools for Ethan are a Rubric and a graphic organizer. Rubrics tell exactly what he needs to do on an assignment so, he upfront knows what he has to achieve to get the grade he wants. A graphic organizer helps put his information in groups and plots so instruction makes sense.
Instruction from movies we watch, and we talk about after watching, is reinforced with comparative instruction in related areas. An example is the movie Remember the Titans. During Black History month we watch it and talk about how things have changed since the 60's. He compares the problems from the 60s to problems today and if things or better or not and why. He did note that there probably wouldn't have been a black president in the 60s. He also noted that President Obama still has trouble but not like he might have had in the 60s.
He is an excellent artist and has an amazing creative mind concerning how his world would be if we all lived in his environment and by his rules. He has great difficulty with his writing skills so I allow him to draw when he's receiving new information like from lectures on American History or new reading activity like books he chooses to read. His spelling words come from his readings. I let him pick the new words from the book as he reads them.
Ethan's strengths are his spelling and reading abilities that are at a level above 6th grade, his knowledge about History and what we study is effective for recall, and now that he has gotten his multiplication tables memorized we'll be able to get past 4th grade level. Yeah! It wasn't until I told him that the majority of Aspie kids get math concepts quickly that he started improving his multiplication tables. I told him that he is math smart and he fitted into the majority, not the minority, of Aspie kids.
His social skills are sharpening. He has fewer & fewer melt downs each day. That means a lot to me. I know what he's capable of and I expect nothing less. He also started karate this semester and has received his second level belt--an orange one. He was so proud of himself and I was happy for him and his success. He is striving to obtain his yellow belt then we'll rethink if that is what he wants to do and go on until January 2011. I belief he has found his niche.
I am a lover of behavioral psychology. Ring the bell and the dog salivates. Ethan's not a dog but he works best when he can cash in on his work. Pay him and he works harder. He is learning a good work ethic. Do your job and do it well then you will be rewarded. I also like Vygotsky and his philosophy of scaffolding and teaching within a community and helping the child get within the zone of proximal development
This school of thought comes from psychological scaffolding. You stand by the child on the scaffold and introduce new information. As you see him or her getting it a little bit you walk further away to the end of the scaffold but within a secure distance. Next you step down one step at a time on the ladder. As you assess his/her level of success with the new information, you may see he/she's stuck so you step back up one step at a time until he/she takes back control and makes measureable progress. Back down you go one step at a time until he/she successfully completes at least an 80% assessment or review exam. Eighty percent is a good goal to start with however, I know Ethan is capable of 90% or greater. So, I let it go at 80% and higher assessment grades are icing on the proverbial cake.
Ethan's immediate community comes from his nuclear family. I am all over social instruction within the community. Ethan has 3 brothers & 6 cousins as well as aunts & uncles, grandparents, and even great-grandparents that influence him behaviorally. He lives with his mother and 3 brothers as well as me and his PawPaw. I'm called MawMaw by my grandchildren. He isn't given special treatment because of his disability except when he melts down quickly and out of control. We intervene for him and redirect his energy and help him, & us, as we try to understand where communication went wrong.
Scaffolding is a way to teach and assess. It works best for students that need one-on-one instruction like Ethan. Ethan was not getting the support he needed in third grade public school in our county and he failed. As a family, we all decided to try homeschooling. We even got input from his estranged father. I felt his Daddy needed to know the change to help catch him up. He agreed and we have been through 2 years of school together.
Next year will be a pivotal point since he will be at the middle school level and his brother who will also be in middle school in 6th grade. It will be another family decision with Ethan being the loudest vote of course. He still has issues with being "different" and his self-confidence hasn't met up with his intelligence. However, I believe it will. I believe his karate will be a great influence for his self-esteem. I believe Ethan will complete his education through to the 12th grade and go on to college. We've already been looking at colleges together!
